revising and editing my paper

i have written a research paper and i got the feedback from my professor on all the mistakes that have been found in it. what i need you to do is revise it and correct it gramarly and follow my professor notes to make it better. if i pass this assignmet i will pass my class please becarful with it it so important. i will attach my file.this is the comments that i got from my professor : 1. Your topic sentence clearly states your paragraph position. 2. Your final draft is paraphrased well within APA guidelines, with proper citation structure. 3. You have not clearly used transition words to show the start of your concession, with proper APA citation structure. All citations need to be explained.You have used a citation, so you have to explain why you used it and how it helps your argument. 4. You have not clearly used transition structure to show the establishment of your rebuttal with proper APA citation. 5. You have used proper APA formatting structure to show your concluding paragraph,but it is weak. – review your main points, and have a stronger call to action!and this is a link to the turn it page with the notes on each mistake:… please tell me if anything is not clear.

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We Should End the Death Penalty
Raed Alqarni
University of New Haven Academic English Preparatory Program
We Should End the Death Penalty
Have you ever thought that you can get killed by your own government for doing
nothing? Thousands of innocent people were sentenced to death for basically doing
nothing besides being at the wrong place at the wrong time. Today I am going to talk
about the death penalty and how we should stop it for the reason of its inhumane and
brutality. We all know that there have been some innocent souls that have been taken
away by the death penalty. Instead of taking people’s lives there should be other
punishments such as life sentence5. Today I will prove that there are many reasons to be
against the death penalty such as the inhumane behind it, its economic factors for the
governments, and there could be a mistake in judgment that could lead to the death of the
wrong people.
The death penalty is inhuman and should not be upheld or executed by anyone no
matter the crime the person has committed. This is because the death penalty is inhuman.
According to BBC UK (2011), there are various reasons as to why the death penalty
should be done away with. The first one is that killing another person is against the moral
standards of our culture and denies the person right to life. The second one is that killing
offenders has not helped in reducing the number of criminals. Crimes are still on the rise,
and there should be other ways of dealing with the criminals other than killing them. The
third reason as to why I am against the death penalty is that there could be a mistake with
the law and an innocent person could be killed, and the guilty one is left free.
However, there are some people who support the death penalty. They have strong
arguments as well for supporting this idea. The first argument is killing a criminal will act
as a warning to other criminals (Bedau, & Cassell, 2004). They might choose to stay
away from the crime to avoid being killed. The other argument is that there are barely
any mistakes when killing a criminal. There has to be sufficient evidence pointing out
that the person is guilty and deserves to die. Lastly, if a criminal takes away the life of
another person, it will be fair if their life is taken as well. This, however, has to fulfill
different conditions for it to be termed as intentional first-degree murder (Death Penalty
Information Center (n.d). Despite the argument supporting the death penalty, I feel that
they are not sufficient enough to support the death penalty. No one deserves to be killed
no matter how serious the crime is. There are many different ways of punishing
offenders. Since killing an offender has not reduced the number of criminals, there should
be a better way of dealing with criminals because killing them is wrong and unfair.
Though mistakes can happen but this is not an ok mistake, what about mistakes
that could kills the wrong person for a crime that he/she never committed. There are
various negative aspects associated with the death penalty and that is why this practice
should be brought to an end (Pulaski, C. A. (1990). First, this form of punishment is not
democratic as it is totalitarian. In a democratic society, everyone is responsible and
therefore when the state sentences, convicts or prosecutes, we the other citizens are
responsible. I myself don’t want anyone to be sentenced to death in my name.
Secondly, the levels of homicide are not low in the states with the death penalty as
a majority of the criminals do not get caught. Racism has also been at the center of
sentencing people to death as many African American individuals have been sentenced to
death disproportionately (Wolfers, J. (2006). To stop this, the death sentence must be
brought to an end. Lastly, this form of punishment is against our culture and religion.
The death sentence is beneficial for different reasons. However, death punishment
has been highly advocated in some countries like Iraq, China and Iran (Ehrlich, I. (1973).
Administering of death sentence helps in dealing with individuals who are notorious to
abuse the human rights. It helps to take care of terrible crimes that happen in a nation.
The sentence is usually admitted in rare cases such as child abuse and murder.
Individuals found guilty of this should not be allowed to live. It also assists in curbing
crime rates as it serves as a warning to individuals committing serious crimes out there.
Therefore, the death sentence must be brought to an end as it is associated will a
lot of negative aspects as compared to the positive ones. Crime does not come to an end
even if someone is killed. The society and family of the defendant may also suffer a lot
with this kind killing. More civilized ways of dealing with crimes need to be developed
rather than executing death sentence on a person.
Death penalty despite being inhuman, it has turned out to be an economic factor
about the cost it impacts to the government. According to different reports published on
the death penalty information center website. Various states have filed reports of the
enormous losses that they have to incur in the event of imposing a death penalty. A study
done in Oklahoma found that executing a death penalty costs the capital 3.2 times more
when compared to other non-capital cases (Meranze, 2011). The investigation revealed
that seeking death penalty requires an average of around $700,000 more when compared
to executing case-level cases. Another report about what is happening in New Mexico
states that the New Mexico legislature had an estimation that enforcing back the death
penalty for the three kinds of homicide cases would attract a massive $7.2 million cost for
the first three years. Ahead with another reason as to why death penalty has a tremendous
economic impact especially in regard to the damage to the government gave a focus to
the report after the investigation by The Reading Eagle and published in the Death
Penalty Information Center website. The report state that Pennsylvania has spent an
estimate of around $272 million in every execution from the time the commonwealth
reinstated its death penalty in 1978 (Dodge & Rennison, 2016)
However, some people will argue that death penalty or what is commonly referred
to as capital punishment helps in cutting down government cost. The argument is that it
tends to cost the government a lot in feeding, clothing, sheltering and providing necessary
things that prisoners need. The convincing point strikes when one tries to imagine the
cost that the government has to incur in funding the life of an imprisoned till he dies. The
supporters of the practice argue that if such person is executed, it will cut the government
some cost (Mandery & Mandery, 2011)
I feel that the argument that death penalty reduces the government cost is not
convincing enough. I think that death penalty has significant cost impacts to the
government. Different reports taken from various states give their worry about the high
costs that they have to incur in the event they are to impose a death penalty.
To sum up, the act of taking criminals lives in the name of capital punishment and
death penalty does not mean that is not extremism and considered inhumane. Nobody
should have the right to end someone life and for us, the people to accept it. We cannot
solve the violence with violence or it would be chaotic. Economic factors of the death
penalty as I proved are affecting the governments and the people in a way or another. We
the people should stand for our rights, so we prevent more killing under the name of
death penalty. The death penalty should stop and be done with other solutions that are
more effective and more sufficient.
Baldus, D. C., Woodworth, G., & Pulaski, C. A. (1990). Equal justice and death
penalties: the legal and the empirical analysis. Upne.
BBC UK (2011) The death penalty – the arguments for and against Retrieved from:
Bedau, H. A., & Cassell, P. G. (2004). Debating the death penalty: Should America have
capital punishment? : the experts on both sides make their case. Oxford: Oxford
University Press.
Cost-Benefit Analysis, the Death Penalty, and Rationales for Punishment. (2006).
Tennessee Research and Creative Exchange. Retrieved from
Death Penalty Information Center (n.d) Crimes Punishable by the Death Penalty
Retrieved from
Donohue III, J. J., & Wolfers, J. (2006). Use and abuse of the empirical evidences in
death penalty debates (No. w11982). National Bureaus of Economic Research.
Ehrlich, I. (1973). The deterrent effects of capital punishments: The questions of life and
Manji, R. (2006). Tennessee Research and Creative Exchange. Cost-Benefit Analysis, the
Death Penalty, and Rationales for Punishment. Retrieved from
Meranze, M. (2011). The Death Penalty. America’s Death Penalty, 72-105.
S?imonovic´, I. (2015). Moving away from the death penalty: arguments, trends and
prespectives. New York: United Nations Human Rights Office of the High Commissioner
1. introduction, background information, thesis statement, topic sentence for
each paragraph, paragraph conclusion sentence, and the conclusion- RED.
2. your paraphrased sentences with citations and explanation in every
paragraph- BLUE.
3. the concession for with citation each paragraph- BLACK.
4.your rebuttal with citation for each paragraph- GREEN.
5.conclusion paragraph- BROWN.
6. reference page- BLACK.

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